Thursday, December 04, 2008

"If this is meant to scare young men like me out of ever getting married, it's working!"

A reader sent me a link to a video and site called that is supposed to be a joke but seems anything but. The video and site are connected to the jewelry store inside JC Penny. I'm surprised that they didn't realize how ridiculous and sexist their little video was. If you want to skip it, it basically shows a man giving his wife a vacuum cleaner for Christmas and he is sucked into a doghouse where other men who have given "sexist" gifts are sent.

One man is sent before a tribunal of women to decide how to get out of this torture chamber and is given advice by the women on how to stay out of the doghouse. At the end of the video, there is a warning to men, "Stay out of the doghouse this holiday" with the implication that buying jewelry is the only way to do this. Is this funny? I don't think so. I agree with one of the Youtube commenters who states: "If this is meant to scare young men like me out of ever getting married, it's working!" Here is the video:

Update: Another reader sends the same link to the video and adds: "I'm thinking if the genders were reversed in this ad, they'd be burning J.C. Penney's to the ground in every mall in America." No, there never would have been an ad like this one up to begin with.



Blogger rebelconformist said...

I just wonder if the add were for Midol and men were locking their wives in cages or in rubber rooms because they all get "CRAZY", would this be as funny?

5:28 PM, December 04, 2008  
Blogger Helen said...


Believe it or not when I was doing my dissertation on PMS in the early 90's, there were ads with women tearing their hair out in the thoes of PMS but no husband was sending them to a padded cell.

5:36 PM, December 04, 2008  
Blogger TMink said...

I think, while amusing, the video is very negative toward women. They are all bitches in the video, and the men are clueless, but at least likeable.


6:51 PM, December 04, 2008  
Blogger The Chief said...

Hey, here's an idea! An ad for one of Nina Hartley's Better Sex Videos. A woman is seen climbing out from under the covers, while a man has a disgusted look on his face. He presses a button, and a hole in the wall opens up and she gets sucked out into the doghouse. The voiceover: "Ladies, don't end up getting sucked into the doghouse--learn to give a better blowjob!"

Yeah, that'd go over real well.

7:12 PM, December 04, 2008  
Blogger uncle ken said...

SInce you can't change the female species follow uncle ken's rules for gifting womens:

1. Never give her anything that plugs in.
2. The best gifts are those that are completely impractical: choclates that melt, flowers that die or lingerie - defined as clothes you put on to take off.

7:19 PM, December 04, 2008  
Blogger Kevin said...

The harridans in the jury are second only to the wife in the "Suzanne researched it" ad from century 21.

9:29 PM, December 04, 2008  
Blogger Roman Wolf said...

Speaking as a young single man, yes, this sort of stuff scares me. I oft think it might be better to just not marry but I at least hope there might be someone for me. However, I will not act as a total bootlick to anyone. I have no problem giving myself 100%, but only to one who's worthy of it. A woman who believes and likes this crap probably isn't worthy of it though.

10:04 PM, December 04, 2008  
Blogger John F Not Kerry said...

"I think, while amusing, the video is very negative toward women. They are all bitches in the video, and the men are clueless, but at least likeable."


Exactly. But the women who represent them in real life will never see themselves that way.

10:33 PM, December 04, 2008  
Blogger John F Not Kerry said...

I am blessedly married to a woman who, while liking jewelry, would rather have scrapbooking materials and gift cards for gifts. And if I do buy her jewelry, it sure won't be from JC Penney (a decision made long ago).

10:36 PM, December 04, 2008  
Blogger DADvocate said...

Tell JCPenney what you think. Here is the link

True, this ad is negative towards both genders.

10:48 PM, December 04, 2008  
Blogger Brett said...


Done and done. Sent a relatively polite e-mail letting them know I would no longer be shopping at their store so long as they feel such marketing is acceptable.

- Brett

11:32 PM, December 04, 2008  
Blogger CubicZirconiaJim said...

Does anyone remember the origin of the 'rule of thumb'? How about the Triangle Shirtwaist Fire? Pity the poor little 'real' men who get their egos bruised because of guerilla marketing.

Modern marriage is descended from arranged marriage by parents to consolidate and expand property and power. Just as racism is a product of slavery, marriage as we know it is a holdover from that 'institution' that enslaved the husband and wife. Though the wife got the short end of the stick.

There are plenty of reasons to be critical of advertising in general. The main goal of all advertising is to make the viewer feel emptiness that can only be filled with so-called goods. What you buy is less important than the message that you must buy something right now. Be a good little consumer. even as the global system implodes on itself.

12:19 AM, December 05, 2008  
Blogger Sniggy said...

I saw that ad a couple days ago. The first part, I thought, was pretty funny since it was fairly predictable (guy gives wife a vacuum, she gets unhappy). Sort of like that scene in Father of the Bride where the groom gave his fiancee a kitchen appliance because he thought she'd like one, while she immediately jumped to the conclusion that he's trying to "subjugate" her. To me, that was just an example of how men and women think differently.

But this JC Penney ad became pretty offensive when the guys were in the dog house. This is no longer about how men and women think differently. It became how men should subjugate themselves to women's whims. Whatever happened to "it's the thought that counts?" This is the kind of thing that gives the rest of us American women a bad name.

As for myself, my husband found out early on that I'd prefer electronics and woodworking tools rather than jewelry, which I almost never wear. I guess it also helps that I'm a really bad housekeeper; that makes household appliances an unlikely present for me.

12:27 AM, December 05, 2008  
Blogger chardin said...

CubicZirconiaJim: What is the rule of thumb to which you refer?

12:51 AM, December 05, 2008  
Blogger Marion said...

See, I have pets that shed fur that has already killed one vacuum. If my boyfriend were to present me with a pet-fur-targeting vacuum for Christmas, I would be thrilled beyond belief. Won't happen - we're on a spending limit this year and the vacuums I'm thinking of far exceed it - but that's high on my list of dream gifts right now.

Yes, I know, there are larger sociological issues with this ad that make me sigh. But once again, I feel as though there is a popular conception of what a woman is/likes/does/watches that just doesn't match up with me. I have two X chromosomes, I have all the appropriate parts - guess something got switched out somewhere...

12:58 AM, December 05, 2008  
Blogger randian said...

Pity the poor little 'real' men who get their egos bruised because of guerilla marketing.

Should we also pity the "poor little 'real' women" getting their egos bruised because of allegedly sexist advertising? Or is the right to judge when other sex is "real" and to judge what the other sex should deem acceptable reserved solely for women?

1:11 AM, December 05, 2008  
Blogger Roman Wolf said...


First off, I'm not even going to address you're first paragraph because it's just one big ad hominem attack.

You're second paragraph is incorrect as well. Racism has been around far longer than slavery. This is because in order to successful enslave a population you have to make them "sub-human" in your eyes before you can keep a sustained slave population(However, this is a bit of a chicken or the egg thing going on here). You're correct more or less on marriage. However, now the man commonly gets the short end of the stick and two wrongs never make a right.

Your last paragraph however has a flaw in it. You're right about marketing tactics...but the system is imploding? I hate to inform you but recessions are good for the economy in the long term, as they're just corrections in the market(granted, we've never really had a free market to begin with; without near perfect information a free market just can't exist). And I assure you that this recession is hurting me more than it's hurting you, my father(a marketing exec/analyst) is out of work.


The "rule of thumb" was an old law in one of the southern states where you couldn't beat your wife with anything wider than your thumb...if I recall.


Now, I originally didn't think I was that effected by this ad...but this was very much my Archduke Franz Ferdinand. The past couple of years, while here at an Indoctrinate U here in Colorado...I've had to deal with a constant barrage of anti-man, anti-capitalist, anti-American, and anti-British(I'm a dual citizen) for the past three years...and to be honest...there is only so much abuse one can take before it starts getting somewhat traumatic. I just think to myself, "I only have a year to go, I can do this and leave this nightmare behind for good." but I must admit, it's getting harder to do. Basically...can anyone recommend anything to help deal with this constant barrage? It's getting pretty hard for me to remain composed against this balderdash.

2:11 AM, December 05, 2008  
Blogger Helen said...


Thanks for the link, I sent them a message:

Your ad about men in the doghouse is sexist, not funny. I realize that J.C. Pennys wants to see men as walking wallets lest they end up in the doghouse, but your ad serves to make women look like shrews and men look like subservient chumps. Think about it, would you dare reverse the genders in an ad like this? Have a woman going to the doghouse for failing to give a man something he needs? If you are not willing to show that ad, then you must realize that the one you have is not appropriate, it is simply allowable in a society that laughs at men and rewards women with jewelry for treating them like dirt. If this is the message you want to send, then don't be surprised when men boycott your store.

Roman Wolf,

At this point, with one year to go, hang in there and join us on the other side. Remember that with your degree, you may be in a better position to fight back, or get involved in work that does not lend itself to this PC dogma. Stay calm, take deep breaths before going into class and if you can make points along the way, do so. Try asking questions in a quizzical way when people start with the PC barrage. For example, one day, a professor in one of my CE seminars was talking about how violent men were and how women were bascially saints. I raised my hand and said politely, "Can you please explain why 25% of arrests now are women who are charged with assault?" He said something about not being an expert in violent women and moved on. However, the point was made. He was not an expert in violent women and didn't know what he was talking about.

4:44 AM, December 05, 2008  
Blogger Jennifer Stites said...

Roman Wolf, There are far more people who think like you do than you realize. You are just a little ahead of your classmates who might not be thinking very deeply just yet. Just wait until they get their first "Wow, what happened to my paycheck" experience and you'll have a little more company. In the meantime, enjoy the folks here and on similar blogs. I've been checking out the blogs of the people writing here and some are terrific. Some are hysterically funny and true at the same time.

6:21 AM, December 05, 2008  
Blogger uncle ken said...

Roman Wolf:

"Basically...can anyone recommend anything to help deal with this constant barrage?"

Ask yourself "what would Rambo do?" Don't engage in arguments with sequestered academic fools who have never earned a paycheck. Walk away. Stop watching the news. Read Hemingway. Find a nice girlfriend who works for a living. Tear the tags off your mattress. Drink wine wth sulfites in it. And when some damn fool won't leave you alone, take a stand. Punch him in the nose. Make the first one count and you won't need a second.

6:59 AM, December 05, 2008  
Blogger Cham said...

I looked at the ad, the only conclusion I could come up with was I certainly wouldn't want a vacuum cleaner as a gift. I have no carpets, and I don't spend too much time cleaning my house. I don't have pets or kids and if I hold my head up high I don't see much dust.

But then again, please don't buy me jewelry. Your taste most likely won't be my taste.

I wouldn't put anyone in the doghouse for a vacuum cleaner, I'd suggest the vacuum wouldn't get much use and maybe a return would be in order. That way the value of the machine could be transferred over to a gift certificate at Campmor, something I could really appreciate.

JC Penny is free to advertise any way they want, I'm free to change the channel. Most ads for jewelry make my eyes roll into the back of my head. DeBeers makes you think diamonds are mandatory in a relationship, Jarod makes you think that any man that doesn't buy his gifts at that store is substandard. As for Zales, someone once bought me a very expensive diamond bracelet there and it broke into 10 pieces within an hour. It's replacement did the same thing.

As for me, I know enough about rocks to buy loose stones from gem dealers and have them set by local jewelers. I create fantastic pieces for probably a tenth of what they would cost in a store.

7:24 AM, December 05, 2008  
Blogger karrde said...

RE: "rule of thumb"

I was told that before the day of commonly-available rulers and tape-measures, carpenters would use the distance to the first knuckle of their thumb as a rough measurement for one inch.

I've never heard the variation related to striking any wives...

As far as the ad goes, I'll call it one more straw for the camel's back.

(It was more than a decade ago when, while watching a modern family-oriented film, I heard my dad exclaim 'Why is the Dad always the stupid one?' Since that time, I've mostly weaned myself off of the culture's attitudes towards men. Of course, that means I read Homer, Beowulf, Tolstoy, and Heinlein, and watch almost no television.)

9:07 AM, December 05, 2008  
Blogger Cham said...

Maybe the problem here isn't the ad, but the expectation that all ads should meet ones ideas of who they are and their values. Think about it. How many of you watch TV ads and think to yourself, "Yes, that could be me in that TV family." or, "I'm just like that person with the nice car, the nice house and that particular concern."?

Is this why people get so upset over ads that don't meet their idea of right and wrong?

9:14 AM, December 05, 2008  
Blogger CubicZirconiaJim said...

Roman Wolf: Oh. I truly am sorry. Didn't realize that ad hominem was frowned upon...or Karma as it relates to men and women yesterday and today. I do understand that Karma is superseded by Grace but this and other forums are not about loving our brothers and sisters for what they truly are.

And as for your claim that this recession is or will be 'good' for the market and correct it; previous recessions were unburdened with the spectre of Peak Oil, Global Warming (with it's tsunami/Katrina/landslide/California wildfire weather), and burgeoning human population. I said in another post that economists in their narrow world view are incapable of seeing anything but unbridled growth. There is, indeed, a correction coming that will stun and humble free market and socialist advocates alike.

A precious few of us or our offspring may survive. We have a few farmer's markets here [in Knoxville] but not enough to feed the population. When the dollar is tanked and not worth the copper in a penny how will one pay for scant food?

We have no system to fall back on when the just over half full oilfields hit the mark and the seven sisters close up shop. Despite greenwash advertising by 'America's Energy Companies'.

Keep on telling yourself: 'I'm going to my happy place.' 'I'm going to my happy place.' etc.

9:19 AM, December 05, 2008  
Blogger br549 said...

Just like I don't read cubic's posts, I didn't view the video.

9:25 AM, December 05, 2008  
Blogger I R A Darth Aggie said...

Sorry, CubicZirconiaJim, but your "rule of thumb" seems to be legend (emphasis mine).
Source: Wikipedia

It is often claimed that the term originally referred to a law that limited the maximum thickness of a stick with which it was permissible for a man to beat his wife, but this has been discredited.

Uncle Ken: you didn't mention rule 3: buy her sparkly, shiny stuff.

9:31 AM, December 05, 2008  
Blogger pockosmum said...

"The "rule of thumb" was an old law in one of the southern states where you couldn't beat your wife with anything wider than your thumb...if I recall."

As IRA Darth Aggie has pointed out, it's a myth. American society has never condoned wife beating, as much as feminists would like us to believe that women were regularly beaten and lived miserable lives until they came along.

"It has often been claimed that wife-beating in nineteenth-century America was legal... Actually, though, several states passed statutes legally prohibiting wife-beating; and at least one statute even predates the American Revolution. The Massachusetts Bay Colony prohibited wife-beating as early as 1655. The edict states: "No man shall strike his wife nor any woman her husband on penalty of such fine not exceeding ten pounds for one offense, or such corporal punishment as the County shall determine."

9:54 AM, December 05, 2008  
Blogger Archivist said...

First, why isn't jewelry considered similarly "sexist"? Or is sexism OK so long as it's something a woman approves of?

Second, why aren't power tools as a gift for a man considered sexist? Oh, that's right, because men use power tools for fun, right?

11:24 AM, December 05, 2008  
Blogger Rigel Kent said...

This commercial could be a good tool as far as classifying women, as far as relationships go.

If she doesn't see a problem with it, or thinks it's funny, then she's no more than a one night stand.

11:26 AM, December 05, 2008  
Blogger Nick said...

I have a good female friend (who is married) who has been upset with Kay Jewelers commercials for some time. Their tag line is "Every Kiss begins with Kay". While its a clever spin on spelling, her beef is that it somehow makes it seem like the only way a husband can get love from his wife is through jewelery.

FYI - I appreciate that you don't want to allow anonymous comments, but it would be nice if you would enable OpenID for authenticating comments. I prefer OpenID greatly to having to use a blogger login. Thanks.

11:26 AM, December 05, 2008  
Blogger ballyfager said...

Don't we all need to lighten up a bit? People are much too quick to take offense these days.

A possible silver lining to the current economic unpleasantness is it might mean the death of the foolishness that is political correctness. People just won't have time for it.

11:40 AM, December 05, 2008  
Blogger Cham said...

If she doesn't see a problem with it, or thinks it's funny, then she's no more than a one night stand.

Is this to be taken 'sex as punishment for women' or do you believe a woman should be hurt and traumatized because a man won't talk to her the day after sex?

If one doesn't think well of a person it might be a tad classier to let that person be and move on with your life.

11:43 AM, December 05, 2008  
Blogger Old RPM Daddy said...

CubicZirconiaJim: I'm willing to bet that pretty much all our tough economic periods were accompanied by weighty pronouncements of doom and gloom. We had the Peak Oil worries back in the early 70s, along with The Coming Ice Age (that was back before Global Warming. Although I think we're going back to Global Cooling now. Whatever).

Different subject: One woman I know asked for a riding mower for Christmas. Her husband got her one. She loved it. I'm not joking. Another woman I know received a semiauotmatic rifle from her husband for Christmas. Nothing says love like an AR-15!

11:51 AM, December 05, 2008  
Blogger Joe said...

The feeling of Shawshankedness that reeks in that dreck is remarkable to me. The review board with the denial stamp.

Ironically, the Andy Dufresne character is raped and brutalized when wrongly convicted and sent to Shawshank. So perhaps the geniuses at JCPenney have decided to play upon such themes as an encouragement to ensure brisk jewelry sales.

This grievance mongering thing could be fun. It is almost Festivus, let us begin the airing of the grievances!

11:54 AM, December 05, 2008  
Blogger Oligonicella said...

CubicZirconiaJim --

"Oh. I truly am sorry. Didn't realize that ad hominem was frowned upon..."

You didn't realize personal attacks were frowned upon?

Triangle Shirtwaist Fire -- Cherry Coal Mine Disaster, Edmund Fitzgerald.

What was your point?

12:00 PM, December 05, 2008  
Blogger chardin said...

Roman Wolf:

You triggered a trap that was set for CubicZirconiaJim. I wanted him to try to sell the urban myth of the "rule of thumb".

I guess I will set more obvious traps in future. They'll still catch idiots like CZJ, and they won't trap intelligent people accidentally.

12:43 PM, December 05, 2008  
Blogger Rigel Kent said...

cham said:
Is this to be taken 'sex as punishment for women' or do you believe a woman should be hurt and traumatized because a man won't talk to her the day after sex?

Exactly how you got either of those from what I said is a mystery to me, I simply described an accurate method to evaluate what the maximum level of a relationship should be.

If a woman thinks it's appropriate to punish someone simply because they get a gift for her she doesn't like, then one certainly shouldn't take a relationship to the level where gifts would be exchanged. And if a person does have such a poisonous personality even taking things to a level where there would be a high degree of personal interaction woiuld be a mistake.

A one night stand however, doesn't even reqire that you know someone's name, much less what kind of person they are. Note: I didn't say, or imply, you should have any sexual relationship (no matter how brief) with someone who likes this commercial; just that you shouldn't take a relationship beyond that level.

Oh, and last time I checked, sex was fun. If you really view it as punishment or trauma, might I suggest a good therapist?

3:13 PM, December 05, 2008  
Blogger Paul said...

What is funny is how the ad unintentionally portrays women as materialistic shrews. Without realizing it, JC Penny created a great anti-marriage ad.

Here is my video response:

3:24 PM, December 05, 2008  
Blogger Helen said...


I liked your video. You made some good points--about gift giving and about how women are portrayed as dominant in marriage. Really, when was the last time a woman was put in the doghouse? Shouldn't marriage be about two adults who are equals rather than one dominant, the other in trouble? I don't know what I would do if I always felt I was in trouble, like a kid in a marriage. That's pathetic.

5:44 PM, December 05, 2008  
Blogger Words Twice said...

"Nothing says love like an AR-15!"

It's more practical than jewelry and loads more fun than a vacuum cleaner.

8:03 PM, December 05, 2008  
Blogger CubicZirconiaJim said...

Oligonicella: my point is that the double standard is alive and well. As illustrated by Chardin's comment [I and people like me being idiots]. Chardin may not see that as a double standard because I am not right leaning at all. Now I am thick skinned and not offended by anyone's comments. Further, I do not bear anyone here any ill will. But does anyone of you claim with a straight face that this web log is not a free-for-all?!? If the rule of thumb is inaccurate I stand corrected but that remains to be seen. Wikipedia is not a peer-reviewed journal.

It is clear, however, that wives were in fact being beaten by husbands. The mere existence of laws on the books prohibiting such behavior is testament to the prevalence of this offense. And the government not condoning it didn't matter one whit. The Freedom Riders in the South including white students did not deserve brutal murder and the federal government did not condone that either...but it was done to send a message.

George Bush has said that 'We don't torture.' despite massive documentary evidence to the contrary. Christopher Hitchens volunteered to undergo waterboarding and clearly stated that it IS torture.

I have eyes to see and ears to hear. And just as with the buildup to the Iraq invasion, I will not toe the party line.

9:06 PM, December 05, 2008  
Blogger Words Twice said...

"Christopher Hitchens volunteered to undergo waterboarding and clearly stated that it IS torture."

Not to get sidetracked here, but I can't let this one go. Hitchens also wrote the following:

"When contrasted to actual torture, waterboarding is more like foreplay. No thumbscrew, no pincers, no electrodes, no rack. Can one say this of those who have been captured by the tormentors and murderers of (say) Daniel Pearl? On this analysis, any call to indict the United States for torture is therefore a lame and diseased attempt to arrive at a moral equivalence between those who defend civilization and those who exploit its freedoms to hollow it out, and ultimately to bring it down. I myself do not trust anybody who does not clearly understand this viewpoint."

9:20 PM, December 05, 2008  
Blogger chardin said...

CubicZirconiaJim: You're the one asserting the existence of a rule of thumb. Prove it. Now.

11:42 AM, December 06, 2008  
Blogger Factory said...

There's no arguing with a true Believer(tm).

3:00 PM, December 06, 2008  
Blogger Micha Elyi said...

Perhaps the J.C. Penney promotion is intended to belittle men in order to distract attention from the question of which shows more class, buying a babe shiny trinkets at the jewelry counter of Penney's or Wal-Mart?

And speaking of cubic zirconium, I've heard from some Jimmy that it's the truly romantic stone to give a girl. Zirconium says "love." A diamond only says "money."

12:09 AM, December 08, 2008  
Blogger Joe said...

I am blessedly married to a woman who, while liking jewelry, would rather have scrapbooking materials and gift cards for gifts.

My wife doesn't like jewelry that much but would rather have rubber stamping materials (she makes fabulous hand-made cards.) Many time I think Jewelry would be cheaper.

* * *

I find most jewelry ads annoying to offensive. As has been pointed out, it portrays women as materialistic shrews. I find diamond ads especially insulting--a local ad basically says that the best way to show your wife you love her is to go into debt buying her a diamond earring or necklace. Apparently putting food on the table and clothes on her back isn't good enough.

2:30 PM, December 08, 2008  
Blogger Joe said...

Paul, I liked your aside on gifts.

I also like how you correctly pointed out that a woman whose love can be bought with jewelry, or any item, is a whore and should be called such.

2:48 PM, December 08, 2008  
Blogger Floridan said...

1. Lighten up
2. Who buys jewelry at JCPenney?

5:32 PM, December 10, 2008  
Blogger Terry said...

I think buying jewelry at JC Penney will wind you up in the doghouse. How ironic.

8:54 AM, December 12, 2008  
Blogger look said...


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