Wednesday, January 25, 2012

"Isn't Two Decades of a Man's Life Worth Nine Months of a Woman's?"

I spent part of the day re-reading Warren Farrell's amazing book The Myth of Male Power. I often forget how ahead of his time Farrell was when he wrote the first edition of the book in 1993 on why men are the disposable sex. Farrell's take on men's reproductive rights are spot on when he states:
Once a man allows himself to love a child deeply, he wants the right to love equally. He realizes that when a woman and he have created a pregnancy, the issue is not the rights of the female vs. the fetus, but the rights of the female, the fetus, and the father. He realizes that a woman who says "It's my body, it's my business," and then chooses to have a child that she makes him pay for forces him to take a job he might like less just because it pays more; forces him to stress himself out and die early--forces him to use his body for eighteen years. If it's his body being used for eighteen years, and his body dying sooner, shouldn't it be his business, too? Isn't two decades of a man's life worth nine months of a woman's?

The short answer is "yes."

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24 Comments:

Blogger Dr.Alistair said...

the long answer is no. and, as women are earning more this situation will get worse....and of course the legislature will pander to them as a group as well.

all we can do is deal with them one at a time.

5:02 PM, January 25, 2012  
Blogger Gordianus the Finder said...

Cannot agree. Both man and woman have responsibility for 18 years. If they do not want that, they should stay out of the sack.

6:27 PM, January 25, 2012  
Blogger DADvocate said...

A man should have the male equivalent of an abortion. At his whim during the pregnancy or within a defined time frame of being informed he has a child, he should be able to abdicate any and all parental responsibility.

Men shouldn't forced into situations any more than women are. They suffer financially and psychologically as much as women. They deserve the same right to opt out of parenthood as women. If women don't like it, they can keep their panties on.

11:06 PM, January 25, 2012  
Blogger E. Steven Berkimer said...

DADvocate,

Paper abortion. And isn't it funny, we still treat a women getting pregnant as something a man does to her. Not as something she is actively involved with.

Glad that women are seen to have agency. /s

We always hear "keep it in your pants", but at what point, seeing as women have multiple forms of birth control and men only a couple, willl we start to hear "keep your legs closed"?

7:19 AM, January 26, 2012  
Blogger TMink said...

Well, at least paper abortion would not involve murder.

Trey

9:03 AM, January 26, 2012  
Blogger SGT Ted said...

We always hear "keep it in your pants", but at what point, seeing as women have multiple forms of birth control and men only a couple, willl we start to hear "keep your legs closed"?

Really. Modern women who wind up pregnant need to quit acting like some guy snuck up on them in their sleep and they just don't know what happened.

11:19 AM, January 26, 2012  
Blogger TMink said...

Well said Sgt. Ted.

Trey

2:22 PM, January 26, 2012  
Blogger Dr.Alistair said...

and i sit back and watch in horror as my step-daughter continues to manoeuvre her boyfriend into moving in together in september, just as her $24 per hour job's one year contract comes to term.

the girl is so determined to have a child at 21 like her mother that she is willing to set herself, the boy and the child up to "win" her game.

her boyfriend by the way is a security guard who has aspirations to become a cop, yet balks at the suggestion of taking the entrance test.

trainwreck?

4:13 PM, January 26, 2012  
Blogger TMink said...

trainwreck.

4:33 PM, January 26, 2012  
Blogger SGT Ted said...

Yup trainwreck. The entrance test isn't hard, unless you have priors, can't pass the poly or are crazy.

7:55 PM, January 26, 2012  
Blogger Mario said...

DADvocate, I agree. In a political and social environment where birth control is reliable and abortion safe and legal, bringing a baby into this world is a choice. Pregnancy, owing to contraceptive failure, may still from time to time be accidental, but birth, never. Birth is always a deliberate choice, and it is a woman's choice.

Women are given 100% of the right as to whether or not to bring a child into this world, and outside of the institution of marriage, they ought to have 100% of the responsibility. That's only fair. A man should be able to legally sever all ties with the child a woman gives birth to, should he choose.

9:10 PM, January 26, 2012  
Blogger DADvocate said...

Women are given 100% of the right as to whether or not to bring a child into this world, and outside of the institution of marriage, they ought to have 100% of the responsibility. That's only fair. A man should be able to legally sever all ties with the child a woman gives birth to, should he choose.

Well said.

9:17 PM, January 26, 2012  
Blogger redrajesh said...

I wrote this back in 2006

"The burden of pregnancy is just a few months in a lifetime of more than 60 years and definitely, it is not the job of the man to bear economic responsibility for his entire working lifetime just because the woman is bearing some biological responsibility for a few months. And capability to get pregnant does not translate into capability to raise children. Pregnancy and motherhood and two different, unrelated things(except for the milk part) and fatherhood is as important as motherhood if not more since the fathers work keeps going up as the kid keeps growing up and the mother actually does less work(in a traditional setup)"

6:30 AM, January 27, 2012  
Blogger redrajesh said...

I am waiting for the day men can say "It's my money, it's my business". And also when men who are raped can actually demand that the female who raped them be forced to undergo an abortion instead of the decision being left to the rapist.

6:34 AM, January 27, 2012  
Blogger Unknown said...

redrajesh,

That day is coming. Men are starting to wake up to the war against them in our current society and I think you will see more saying, it's my money and my business. Warren Farrell, in the "Myth of Male Power" written in 1993 talks about how important it is for men to wake up to what is happening to them. Now, almost 20 years later, many men are on strike. But going on strike may not be enough. The laws that continue to favor women and put men into involuntary servitude or place them in legal situations with no due process must be fought.

Helen

7:12 AM, January 27, 2012  
Blogger Dr.Alistair said...

my step-son won't marry. he's 26 and understands the bad deal. it will break his mother's heart, but she's not the one who would have to deal with the aftermath.

in regard to my step-daughter's boyfriend, he's a classic pussy, doomed to angry outbursts over his absolutist moral positions, and is the perfect cowed wimp to be run by a domineering girl like her who will badger him into whatever psychodrama she can concoct.

she thinks he will apply to the force, but he knows he's too flighty and passive-aggressive to keep it together on the force...or worse, he could get on and meet some real tough guys who bluff him into something fatal.

but that appeals to my step-daughter's fight grrrl mentality, which you would think she would have grown out of by now....

9:25 AM, January 27, 2012  
Blogger SGT Ted said...

I saw a prime example of the Modern Woman yesterday, pregnant and shopping with food stamps in the most expensive store in town, which is the local trendy-hippy Co-Op. Well dressed too.

How nice it must be to get a check for using your genitalia.

10:08 AM, January 27, 2012  
Blogger Dr.Alistair said...

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/un-sets-up-womenonly-food-aid-in-haiti-1884361.html

off-topic, yet not.

7:42 AM, January 28, 2012  
Blogger Lord Jiggy said...

It's about equal (reproductive) rights, if we were to be "fair" about it. Seems like the person with 100% of the "choice" to become a parent or not should have 100% of the responsibility. That's a pro-choice argument you'll never hear from a feminist.

12:03 PM, January 28, 2012  
Blogger Gordianus the Finder said...

Men should NOT have the right to sever all ties with the child, and the woman should NOT have the right to kill the child.

Just because one morally repugnant thing is permissible in our society for the moment, that is not an excuse to allow a SECOND morally repugnant thing.

3:55 PM, January 28, 2012  
Blogger SGT Ted said...

Point taken, but if the law is to be reproductive autonomy based on Liberty, my body is mine, it's time for men to get equality before the law. "Best interest of the child" is now just an excuse to separate men from their money and transfer it to irresponsible women.

5:15 PM, January 28, 2012  
Blogger SGT Ted said...

Men already can sever legal ties to the child, but only with the mothers consent.

It's time to make men's reproductive liberty equal to that of a womans.

5:17 PM, January 28, 2012  
Blogger Gordianus the Finder said...

Sgt. Ted,

Agree 100% it is time for equality under the law. But it's the CHILD who needs equal protection. It should have the same protections from maternal homicide as it does from paternal homicide.

4:41 PM, January 29, 2012  
Blogger Jane said...

IT's not even about abortion, really -- it's more equivalent of surrendering a child for adoption, which a woman can do unilaterally but a man can't.

4:06 PM, January 31, 2012  

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